Valentines Day Joke

Prev Article Next Article

Here are Valentines Day Joke especially for Valentines Day 2018. These Valentines Day Jokes are for kids Singles Adults Seniors and others quoted separately. Valentines Day Jokes One liners especially in English and Hindi language are provided in this article.

Contents

Valentines Day Jokes One Liners

Valentines day gift. Get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day.

Why is Valentine’s Day the best day for a celebration? Because you can really party hearty!

Dear men, “I don’t want anything for Valentine’s Day” is the same as “I’m fine.” You’re welcome.

What do squirrels give for Valentine’s Day? Forget-me-nuts.

Vaentines day foodie joke. Why did the cannibal break up with his girlfriend? She didn’t suit his taste!

How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend on valentines day? He gave her a ring.

What did the girl cat say to the boy cat on Valentine’s Day?
You’re purrr-fect for me.

Where do all the hamburgers take their girlfriend on Valentine’s Day?

To a meatball.

What Valentine’s Day candy is best to give a girl?
Her-She Kisses.

One morning Emma woke up with a start. Her husband Jim asked what was the matter, she told him, “I just had a dream that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine’s day. What do you think it means?”

“You’ll know tonight,” Jim said.

That evening, Jim home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, Emma opened it – only to find a book entitled “The meaning of dreams”.

Man: “Honey, on this Valentine’s Day, I want to tell you something… I’m not rich like Jack. I don’t have a mansion like Russell. I don’t have a Porsche like Martin. But I do love you and I want to marry you.”

Woman: “Oh, dear, I love you too! What was that you said about Martin?”

Mike walked into a post office just before Valentine’s day, he couldn’t help noticing a middle-aged, balding man standing in a corner sticking “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. Then the man got out a bottle of Channel perfume from his pocket and started spraying scent over the envelopes.

By now Mike’s curiosity had got the better of him, and so I asked the man why he was sending all those cards. The man replied, “I’m sending out 500 Valentine cards signed, ‘Guess who?’”

“But why?” asked Mike.

“I’m a divorce lawyer,” the man replied.

Valentines Day Jokes for Singles

I just saved a bunch of money on Valentine’s Day by switching to single.

Being single can lead you to this.
Q: What happened when the man fell in love with his garden?

A: It made him wed his plants!

I’m gonna spend Valentines day with my ex…… box 360

Dear Alcohol….. Will you be my Valentine?

Tomorrow is Valentine’s day. Don’t worry if you’re single. You’re going to die alone anyway!

To all my friends who are commited: Happy Valentine`s Day!. and To all my friends who are single, Happy Independance Day

What is the true purpose of Valentine’s Day? To remind single people they are single.

Valentines Day Jokes for kids:

Did you hear about the nearsighted porcupine? He fell in love with a pincushion!

Why did the stupid boy put clothes on the valentines he was sending? Because they needed to be ad-dressed!

What is the true purpose of Valentine’s Day? To remind single people they are single.

Why is Valentine’s Day the best day for a celebration? Because you can really party hearty!

What did one oar say to the other? “Can I interest you in a little row-mance?”

What did the pencil say to the paper? “I dot my i’s on you!” Why did the cannibal break up with his girlfriend? She didn’t suit his taste!

Do you have a date for valentines day? Yes, February 14th

You wanna hear a joke? Valentine’s Day

Valentines Day Joke – Valentines Day 2018 Jokes 4 kids Singles Adults Seniors – One liners Hindi

Valentine’s Day Jokes for Dirty Adults- Whatsapp Status Messages:

R.I.P. to the virgin vaginas that were lost on Valentine’s Day over a few roses!

Today is National Condom day!
A survey report says that 65% of all women carry condoms. The other 35% carry babies.

Choose how you spend your Valentine day!
S3x is good, sex is fine;
Doggy style or 69;
Just for fun or getting paid;
Everyone just loves getting laid;
So if you want me in the sack;
Lick your lips and text me back.
Happy Valentine’s day!

Changing perspective:
5th grade: So did you kiss her?
11th grade: So did you f**k her?
Happy Valentine’s day!

Scientists have discovered a certain food that diminishes a woman’s sex drive on Valentines Day by 90 percent…. Wedding cake.

Valentine’s Day is a very popular date for many people. Whether you are celebrating a new love, or a long-term relationship, or you’re at home sulking over a lost love, Valentine’s Day is a significant day for almost everyone. On this day across the country cards, flowers, candies, love letters, and cute and furry little stuffed animals are sent, given, and unwrapped every year. Countless couples go to many different places for dates to show their significant others how much they care and value them. Hope you enjoyed the valentines day jokes. You can quote your best valentine’s day joke in the comment section below.

Originally posted 2018-02-08 08:55:00.