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I will marry the girl, who look pretty in her Adhaar card 🙂
A man asks a trainer in the gym: “I want 2 impress that beautiful girl , which machine can I use?” Trainer replies: “Use the ATM”
Someone on his status “Sleeping” …since 3 Days! He’s Probably dead.
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Relationships are like batteries, they have a positive & a negative side. And you end up whacking your remote instead of changing them.
I sprayed Taylor Swift’s new perfume on me, then started writing a five page letter to the boy who forgot to put a straw in my bag at Arby’s.
Religion is like a buffet. People take what they like and ignore the rest.
It’s almost 2015, I expect a toaster that pops the bread up in a less terrifying way.
Just saw the most smartest person when i was in front of the mirror 😛
God is really creative , i mean ..just look at me 😛
My study period = 15 minutes. My break time = 3 hours.
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People say everything happens for a reason. So when I punch you in the face, remember I have a reason. 😉
Open Books, Not Legs. Blow Minds, Not Guy[/quote]
I Have Good News And Bad News To Tell You. The Bad News? I Have No Good News. And The Good News? I Have No Bad News.
Do You Want To Go Out With Me? (A) Yes (B) A (C) B.
You Don’t Know Something? Google It. You Don’t Know Someone? Facebook It. You Can’t Find Something? Mom!
Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it’s wide use three fingers, make sure it’s wet and rub up and down. Yep that’s how you wash a cup.
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My life feels like M. Night Shyamalan is directing it because it makes absolutely no sense and I don’t even wanna finish it.
You don’t get to complain about life until you move out of your parent’s house.
The first rule of selfie club should be clean your room.
me: *owns 264 unread books*
me: *buys 17 new books*
me: *rereads harry potter*
I believe in hate at first sight.
You shouldn’t be sad because sad spelled backwards is das and das not good.
Teens, you should not being getting drunk. You’re annoying enough as it is.
Just assume that we aren’t close enough for you to send me a Candy Crush invite.
Rompers are great until someone has to pee.
Holiday survival tip: A candy cane can be sucked into a weapon.
No one’s going to do it for you. It’s up to just you to make naps a priority in your life.
I’m alone in my car. Counting it as a vacation.
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That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything and all you can think is “act natural, you’re innocent.”
Just changed my dating profile headline to: “Seeking rich old men with bad hearts and no relatives” …crossing my fingers.
“Oh holy shit, what the hell is this!” -people who request songs on the radio discovering the internet for the first time
A lot of people have a fear of flying. Not me. I have a fear of crashing and dying.
I’m suspicious of people who don’t like dogs…But I totally trust a dog when it doesn’t like a person.
I simply haven’t seen enough solid evidence that suggests not drinking is better than drinking.
Making an effort in the last of 2014 to cut away distractions so I can spend more time with my iPhone.
Some people should come with subtitles.
notice everything. I just pretend not to.
I wonder if my dog always follows me into the bathroom when I have to go potty because I always follow him outside when he does and he just thinks that’s how it works.
I’m what you would call “indoorsy”
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You don’t realize how lonely you are until it’s the end of the day and you have a bunch of things to talk about, but no one to tell them to.
It’s so frustrating knowing how terrible of a person someone actually is, but everyone loves them because they put on a good show.
Facebook account for sale, Friends included.
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I drink to make other people interesting. – “George Jean Nathan”
Using Shamwow to clean up my puke. Surprisingly works pretty well.
can see Alaska from my house.
So you’re telling me there’s a chance. (Or any Dumb&Dumber quote)
Google just called… Google said, “Someone is looking for you”.
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edhuvume pannaadhadhal block pannenu sollittu andha Idyayum block pannittu poiduchi
Edhavadhu silmisham pannikkite irukkanum pola 🙂
Jeevan ullavarai manithan
Panam ullavarai Mariyaathai
Nesam ullavarai Paasam
Yen Uyir ullavarai Nam Natpu
Sivapu manithanukum nizhal karuputhan
karupu manithanuku ratham sivaputhan
vannangalil illai vazhkai
Manitha enangalil ullathu vazhkai
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Biwi Ko Apni Palko Pe Bitha Lo
De K Khushi Uske Sare Gam Chura Lo
Pyar Aisa Karo K Sab Dekhte Rah Jaye
Padosan bhi Aa Ke Kahe
Muje Bhi Apni Biwi Bana Lo…. 😀
इंसान को Doctor और God से
कभी दुश्मनी नही करनी चाहिए
Kyoki भगवान नराज होता है
तो Doctor के पास भेज देता है और
#Doctor नराज होता है तो #भगवान के पास भेज देता है।
लड़कियां भी अजीब होती हैं,
तैयार होने के लिए पार्लर जाती हैं
पार्लर जाने के लिए भी तैयार होती हैं। 😀 :p :v
#सोनिया: बेटा राहुल,
अब तुमने पार्टी का क्या सोचा है?
#राहुल : मम्मी, कल ही तो कांग्रेस हारी है
अभी पार्टी करेंगे तो अच्छा नहीं लगेगा 😀 😛
मुझे इतना भी मत घुमा ए जिंदगी,
मै शहर का शायर हूँ , “MRF का टायर” नही
ऐ खुदा हिचकियों में कुछ तो फर्क डालना होता
अब कैसे पता करूँ कि कौनसी वाली याद कर रही है 😛
कैसे बनेगा अमीर वो हिसाब का कच्चा बूढा भिखारी, जो बस एक रुपये के बदले सिग्नल पे खड़ा बेशकीमती दुआए दे देता है।
Latest Funny Malayalam Whatsapp Status Update Message :
Palliyil 50 ps ittu
Nalloru friendne Tharane..
Thannittu paranju 50 paisakku ithe Kittoo.!
Sms : 9567374358 caLl
Dundu mol achanod: acha, tintu inn enje thenghil kayaran kure nirbanthichu..
Achan: ennitt ne kayariyo?
Dundu:enik ariyam nan thenghil kayarumbhol avanj ente shaddi kanananennu.
Dundu:ath kond nan shaddi uriyittitt kayari…
. Palliyil 50 ps ittu
Nalloru friendne Tharane..
Thannittu paranju 50 paisakku ithe Kittoo.!
A girl to her lover:
Ikka..Ingal Njan Parayanadh
Boy :: ijj Para Nte Muthe..
Girl :: Njammakk Ambli
Boy :: Amblimaamane Ankku
Thannal Perunnal Aayonn Ante
Kashandi Thalayil Noki
Neelakasham nilaavine snehichu…orupadu…pakshe, nilavu snehichathu nakshatrangale..swayam ariyathe poya aa pranayathe orth neelakasham innum vidhumbunnu..Aa kannuneer aanu mazhayay peyyunath…
varshangalkum,, yugangalkum aa pranayathe maaykan kazhinjilla.
107 Extremely Funny Whatsapp Status English Hindi Tamil Malayalam Update Very Funniest Message Download Online.
Originally posted 2014-12-26 09:10:37.